January 15, 2019

There's a ton of movies that are based around water, and having a unique pair of sunglasses (like we do) that can float on water, we couldn't help but imagine if these floating sunnies somehow ended up on the faces of some of the most popular characters in movie history. Here are my top 5:

1. Chuck Noland - Cast Away

This is one of those movies I’ve seen 20 times and I never know how to feel about it. Is it a happy ending? A sad ending? Why do I suddenly hate Helen Hunt? It’s not her fault this fictional plane went down! Anyways, if there is one guy who could have most functionally used a pair of polarized floating sunglasses it’s Chuck Noland. Poor guy is stuck in all that sun with nothing to protect his peepers. He would have been left with a pressing choice on the raft though…go after Wilson? Or the Floating Shades? I think we all know the answer...

2. Captain Jack Sparrow - Pirates of the Caribbean

We know boaters love our floating sunglasses. And sunglasses are a top accessory. Who loves boats and accessories more than CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow?! While everything else is sinking to the bottom of Davy Jone’s Locker, the KZ Floating Sunglasses will be left on the surface waiting to be pillaged by the next band of scalawags. The only problem is…would he want to cover up all that guy-liner?

3. Martin Brody - Jaws

Not really sure how floating sunglasses would have done Martin Brody any good considering the whole point of the movie is to stay out of the water, but something tells me there could have been a solid storyline built around that shark and the floating shades.

4. Ariel - The Little Mermaid

Alright. This one is a bit of a stretch. Obviously living ‘Unda da sea’ creates a problem for sunglasses that float, but who doesn’t think Ariel wouldn’t look good in a pair of our new Floatable Rounds? I guess if we want to split hairs, she would only not be able to wear them for part of the movie, so maybe the original argument is moot. Either way, I’m sure they would have looked great in her grotto with the rest of her thingamabobs.

5. Jack Dawson - Titanic

Who doesn’t remember this movie growing up? One of the greatest love stories ever told, right? Girls around the world fawned over Jack, and boys around the world couldn’t wait for the couch scene. Now when it comes to the floating sunglasses, where do you begin with the witty jokes? I kinda feel bad because it is a tragedy that really did occur, but I think there is one thing we can all agree on, THERE WAS ROOM ENOUGH ON THE DOOR FOR BOTH OF YOU, ROSE!